An actionable, neurodivergent-friendly approach to flexible goal-setting

A New Year, A New Approach

This year, it’s time to trash the dreaded “New Year’s resolution”—it’s just not built for neurodivergent minds. Let’s trade in overwhelm and perfectionism for something better: creativity, flexibility, and experimentation. That feels more doable, don’t you agree?

But where do we start? Well, let’s be real: traditional goal setting, habit tracking, and anything that requires long-term sustainable effort… kinda suck. Sure, you’ve got the usual “exercise more,” “find a new job,” “eat better,” and “read more” goals on your list. The problem? Boooring! 🥱

On the flip side, maybe you are genuinely psyched to start working out—you just downloaded a fun new fitness app, and you’re ready to give it a go. That’s awesome! But take a moment and think: how long does that momentum usually last? Will you still be excited next month, or even next week?

Here’s the truth: rigid formulas don’t work. Life isn’t predictable, and energy levels shift, especially for neurodivergent folks. Instead of following a one-size-fits-all approach, let’s focus on small, adaptable steps that play to your unique strengths. This isn’t about perfection—it’s about finding what works for you.

Ready to explore a better way to achieve success this year? Let’s dive in.

Simple Steps to Reassess What Matters Most (Neurodivergent-Friendly)

Before you set any goals, take a moment to figure out where you are right now. Think of it like planning a road trip—you can’t map out a route unless you know your starting point. Skipping this step? That’s like heading out with no GPS and hoping for the best. 🚗💨

Quick Life Check-In

Start by reflecting on the key areas of your life. Here’s where you might want to pause and ask yourself some simple, but powerful, questions:

• Work: Are you feeling energized by what you do, or is work draining you dry?
• Creativity: How often do you give yourself time to create or explore just for fun?
• Relationships: Are the people around you filling your cup, or are they adding to your stress?
• Energy: Are you rested and ready most days, or constantly running on fumes?
• Self-Care: How well are you taking care of you—physically, mentally, and emotionally?

Ask Yourself:

• What’s going well? Celebrate those wins, no matter how small!
• Where do you feel stuck or drained? This is your chance to acknowledge what’s weighing you down.
• What’s one small improvement you’d like to make this month? Keep it simple—tiny changes can lead to big progress.

Rate Your Life Areas

If structure helps you, try scoring each area on a scale from 1 to 10:

• Are you thriving in your career, or is it starting to feel like too much?
• Do you feel energized and rested, or are you constantly running on empty?
• Are you setting solid boundaries, or do you find yourself saying yes when you mean no?

This isn’t about being hard on yourself. It’s about gaining clarity so you can focus on what really matters. Once you’ve figured out where you are, choose just one area to start with. The goal here isn’t to tackle everything at once—it’s to find a small, manageable step forward.

Feeling overwhelmed by executive dysfunction? Check out this guide on overcoming executive dysfunction at work for practical tips on regaining control.

Prototype Your Vision for the Year

Next up—Prototyping! Don’t worry, we’re not building high-tech gadgets, testing rockets, or designing the next viral app (although that sounds pretty cool 🚀). Instead, we’re borrowing a key concept from Design Thinking and giving it a life-centered twist: Life Design. If you’re curious about how this works in detail, I highly recommend checking out Designing Your Life. It’s packed with practical insights!

In Design Thinking, prototyping is all about making an idea tangible and testable before going all in. Think of it as a quick, low-pressure draft—a way to explore whether something feels right before committing fully.

Why Traditional Goal-Setting Falls Short

Here’s the thing: traditional goal-setting assumes you already know exactly what you want. It expects you to be 100% clear from the start about what matters most. But real life isn’t that simple, right? Often, what we think will make us happy doesn’t align with what we actually need once we start working toward it.

That’s why prototyping your vision is a game-changer. By exploring and testing ideas first, you’re not locking yourself into rigid expectations—you’re staying flexible and discovering what truly resonates with you.

Real-World Example: The Shift from Productivity to Boundaries

Let me share a quick story about a client of mine. When we first started working together, he told me his primary goal was to be more productive at work. He figured that if he could just get more done, everything else would fall into place—better work-life balance, less stress, more time for himself.

Instead of jumping straight into productivity hacks, I asked him to write a short, imaginative story about what his most productive day might actually look like.

During the session, something unexpected happened. As he described his ideal day, he realized that productivity wasn’t the real issue. What he actually wanted was to establish better boundaries with his team, so he could protect his evenings and spend more quality time with his family.

If he hadn’t taken the time to prototype his vision, he might have set an arbitrary productivity goal—one that would have left him feeling more drained rather than fulfilled. Instead, he uncovered what truly mattered and could focus on goals that aligned with his deeper priorities.

This is the power of prototyping your vision. It helps you go beyond surface-level goals and connect with what genuinely feels meaningful.

Write Your “Hero Story”

Now it’s your turn. Imagine it’s the end of the year, and you’re reflecting on everything you’ve achieved. What would make the year feel truly great?

Writing a short “hero story” is a powerful exercise to help you visualize the life you want to create. Focus on these key areas:

• Emotions: How do you want to feel—calm, accomplished, fulfilled?
• Accomplishments: What specific wins would make you proud?
• What mattered most: What priorities did you honor that made a real difference?

Example Hero Story:
“This year, I found a rhythm that works for my brain. I focused on meaningful projects, set clear boundaries, and made time for creativity without guilt. By the end of the year, I felt energized, confident, and in control.”

Why does this work? Because writing your hero story helps you emotionally connect to your vision. When your goals feel personal and meaningful, you’re far more likely to stay motivated—even when things get tough.

Mind Map Your Focus Areas

Once you’ve written your hero story, break it down into focus areas. These are broad categories where you can experiment and make progress throughout the year. Here are a few examples to get you started:

• Work: What changes would help you feel more in control at work?
• Relationships: How can you strengthen the connections that matter most?
• Self-Care: What small routines could help you recharge and feel balanced?
• Creativity: How can you carve out time for hobbies or passion projects?

Under each category, brainstorm a few small, actionable steps or experiments. Remember, the goal isn’t perfection—it’s progress. Keep it light and flexible:

• Work: Try using time-blocking for a week to see if it boosts your focus.
• Self-Care: Schedule one tech-free evening each week and notice how it feels.
• Creativity: Spend 20 minutes a day on something fun, like sketching, journaling, or playing music.

By breaking things down into small, manageable steps, you’ll make it easier to stay consistent without feeling overwhelmed.

Life Experimentation: A Refreshing Alternative to Rigid Goal-Setting

Okay, here comes the fun part! Let’s get real for a second—rigid goals can feel like a trap, especially for neurodivergent professionals. Life’s unpredictable, energy fluctuates, and sticking to a strict, one-size-fits-all plan? That’s a recipe for burnout.

This is where life experimentation comes in. Instead of locking yourself into hard-and-fast rules, treat your goals like mini experiments. Think of each one as a low-pressure opportunity to explore and adapt. There’s no fear of failure—just valuable insights waiting to be discovered.

How to Experiment with Your Goals

Ready to give life experimentation a try? Here’s a simple three-step approach to help you get started:

1. Form a Hypothesis
   Think about something you’d like to test and predict what might happen.
   • Example: “If I take a 5-minute reset break between tasks, I’ll feel more focused and less drained by the end of the day.”
2. Set a Short Test Period
   Keep it light—try it out for just one week. The goal is to stay curious, not overwhelmed.
3. Reflect and Adjust
   After your experiment, take a moment to reflect:
   • What went well?
   • What didn’t work as expected?
   • How can you tweak it to better fit your needs?

A Few Simple Experiments to Try

Not sure where to begin? Here are a few quick and easy life experiments to spark some ideas:

• Energy Management: Test doing your hardest task during peak energy hours. See if it leaves you feeling more productive and less fatigued.
• Self-Care: Add a quick, 5-minute mindfulness practice to your morning routine and notice if it helps improve your focus or mood.
• Work Boundaries: Try turning off notifications during a dedicated deep work session and see how it impacts your concentration.

The magic of life experimentation is that it keeps things light, flexible, and fun. Instead of chasing perfection, you’re simply figuring out what works best for your unique brain.

Want more strategies to stay productive without stress? Check out this guide on reclaiming your focus.

Resilience Without the Stress: Prevent Burnout the Neurodivergent-Friendly Way

Okay, so I’m guessing if you’ve made it this far, you’re feeling at least a little excited. You’re on board with life assessments, prototyping, and experimenting. But let’s be real—this isn’t your first attempt at trying to “Make [Insert Year Here] the Best Year Ever!”

I get it. You’re not alone. And while I’d love to say I have a magical solution that’ll solve all your problems and help you finally achieve ultimate success, I don’t. (If I did, let’s be honest—this blog post would cost way more. 😉)

So, if that skeptical voice in your head is chiming in right about now, trying to convince you that you need to be perfect, push harder, and follow this plan to a T—let’s address that head-on. Because resilience isn’t about perfection.

Burnout has a sneaky way of creeping in—especially when you’re constantly trying to “do it all.” The truth is, resilience isn’t about working harder or sticking to rigid plans no matter what. It’s about staying flexible, learning to adapt, and respecting your limits.

Think of resilience like building a bridge. A rigid bridge cracks under pressure, but a flexible one bends and absorbs the impact. That’s the kind of resilience we’re aiming for—bending without breaking.

3 Practical Tips for Building Resilience

1. Align Goals with Your Values
   Goals feel lighter and more sustainable when they’re rooted in what truly matters to you. When your goals align with your values, resilience happens naturally—you’re not forcing it.
   • Example: “I want to set boundaries because protecting my energy helps me show up fully for the things that matter most.”
2. Give Yourself Permission to Adjust
   Life changes, energy shifts, and that’s okay. Resilient people know when to pivot. Don’t be afraid to tweak your plan—perfection isn’t the goal, progress is.
   • Ask yourself: “What’s one smaller step I can try instead?”
3. Break the Overwhelm Cycle
   When life feels like too much, pause. Instead of trying to fix everything at once, take a breath and ask yourself:
   “What’s the next smallest action I can take?” Small steps build momentum without adding unnecessary stress.

Curious about burnout? Check out this helpful guide on spotting burnout early and how to prevent it before it spirals.

How To Actually Implement This S**t!

Alright, you’ve made it to the end of this post—first off, 👏 major props to you! Seriously, that’s no small feat. Second, let’s be real—you’ve probably already forgotten most of what you just read. Don’t believe me? Pop Quiz!

• What are the key areas in a life assessment?
• What’s a prototype?
• What are the steps of a life experiment?
• What’s the title of this blog post??
• Oh, and just for fun…what’s my last name?!

😳 Staring blankly right now? Don’t worry—I won’t take it personally. It’s not you; it’s just how memory works. And if you’re neurodivergent, it’s really how memory works.

Here’s the thing—information alone doesn’t change lives. To make real progress, you need repeated exposure, reflection, and a solid implementation plan. So, let’s make sure you walk away with something actionable:

🌟 Start Small: Your 3-Step Plan to Kick Off the Year

1. Grab 3 Blank Sheets of Paper

Think of these as your brainstorming and planning canvas:

• Page 1:
  • Front: Life Assessment (15 minutes)
  • Back: Hero Story (30 minutes)
• Page 2:
  • Front: Focus Areas Mind Map (15 minutes)
  • Back: Life Experiment Ideas (15 minutes)
• Page 3:
  • Your Final Plan (Front and Back combined, 45 minutes total)

2. Reflect on Where You Are (15 minutes)

On the front of Page 1, jot down answers to these key questions:

• What’s working well in my life right now?
• Where do I feel stuck or drained?
• What’s one small improvement I’d like to make this month?

3. Write Your Hero Story (30 minutes)

Flip Page 1 over, and imagine it’s December 31st of next year. Write a short, vivid story of what your ideal year looked like:

• How did you feel throughout the year?
• What did you accomplish that truly mattered?
• What changes or experiments made the biggest impact?

This isn’t just about dreaming big—it’s about creating a vision you can connect to emotionally.

4. Mind Map Your Focus Areas (15 minutes)

On the front of Page 2, draw out your key focus areas (e.g., Work, Self-Care, Creativity). Under each, brainstorm a few small, actionable steps or experiments to help you grow in that area.

5. Pick One Small Experiment (15 minutes)

Flip Page 2 over, and choose one experiment to try this week. Keep it simple and low-pressure:

Example:
“I’ll block off 30 minutes each day for deep work and track how it affects my focus.”

6. Create Your Clean Plan (45 minutes)

On Page 3, consolidate everything into a simplified, easy-to-follow plan:

• Assessment Summary: A brief overview of your current priorities.
• Hero Story: Keep this at the center—it’s your vision!
• Focus Areas & Experiments: List your key focus areas and the first small experiment you’re starting.

Once done, schedule your experiment in your calendar or planner. This step turns a good idea into real action!

Final Reminder: Small Steps = Big Progress

If committing to a long-term plan feels overwhelming, that’s okay. Remember—you don’t have to get it perfect. Just start small, stay curious, and keep experimenting. Progress, not perfection, is the goal here.

Closing: A New Year, Your Way

This year, give yourself permission to:

• Experiment with strategies that actually suit your brain.
• Focus on progress, not rigid perfection.
• Build a life that reflects your unique values and strengths.

So, what’s one small experiment you’re excited to try this week? Share your ideas—I’d love to cheer you on!

Feeling ready to thrive? Discover neurodivergent-friendly coaching designed to help you create a balanced, burnout-free year. For more practical strategies, visit Go Beyond Knowing.